16. Coaching as HR On Call. Another company, in the consumer products industry, has used Coaching as an adjunct HR resource over a period of many years. Through cross-cultural projects, organizational restructuring, succession planning, team building, performance improvement, and crisis management, coaching has been called upon to render assistance as needed. "At this point, we have worked together for so long," notes the Vice President of Human Resources, "that our trust level is high. Knowing that you are only a phone call away, when it seems like a situation would benefit from your coaching, makes our HR program both more effective and creative. We have sometimes called you in by design, as a first response, and other times we have brought you in to help with a difficult situation, almost as a last resort. But either way coaching has been a welcome and effective intervention with our executives and directors."
17. Coaching as 3-D Glasses. As an intervention, coaching often enables people to see things in new ways. That was certainly the experience of our next interviewee, a senior project analyst for a major U.S. corporation. It was, for her, like putting on those special glasses to watch a 3-D movie -- things suddenly came into focus and jumped out at her in fresh and surprising ways. "Since I worked with my coach for 18 months, we had plenty of material to work with," she recalls. "From health and fitness, to career development, to relationship work we covered all the bases, generating many "light bulb" moments along the way. My self-talk, my daily habits, and my overall perspective have all improved. The coaching process has assisted me to get where I want to go."
18. Coaching as Guiding Light. Given the forwarding action of the coaching process, and given his profession as an ordained minister, it came as no surprise that our next client came up with "guiding light" as a metaphor for coaching. "When I came to coaching," he notes, "I was in my first year of employment at a new church. And I wanted to make it the best year possible. So I came with my goals in hand as to what I wanted to accomplish at the church. Much to my surprise, I ended up with a whole new set of goals that were more life-goals than ministry-goals. I came to see how the two worked hand in hand. I spend more time with my wife and children now, including family devotions, and I write in my journal 4-5 times a week. These were things I used to preach, but failed to incorporate in my only daily habits. Now all that has changed. I put people before programs. Coaching has led me to this place like a guiding light, and it is really peaceful."
19. Coaching as Healthy Relationship. That "peaceful, easy feeling" captures the experience of another client who is a suburban housewife, homemaker, and home-schooling mom. As someone who is, at times, out of step with the prevailing culture (she describes herself as "an alternative cosmic visionary"), and as someone who has recently suffered a tragic and violent death in the family, this client is more than happy to pay for a healthy relationship with her coach. Especially when it assists her to have healthy relationships with all the other people in her life. "Because I frequently dare to be different, it's not uncommon for people to challenge me about my choices," she observes. "That's why it's been great to work with a coach who affirms me and who assists me to set and maintain healthy boundaries with those who challenge me. And your support when my dad was murdered proved to be invaluable. There's no way to say enough about how coaching has kept me going and moved me forward."
20. Coaching as Spiritual Formation. Another client has used the coaching process to develop her spiritual life. "Can you assist me to find God?" was the way she put the question during her initial call. Since that time, more than four years ago, we have been on a quest to see life through sacred eyes -- and it's not just been a matter of perspective. "One of the things I enjoy most about the coaching," she reports, "is the orientation around spiritual practice. It has me doing things in the physical world in order to get me connected to the spiritual world. So we have developed an elaborate set of rituals which I practice faithfully on a daily basis in order to deepen my spiritual life. Given my health challenges, those practices mostly take place within my home. But they open my eyes to the movement of spirit around the world and throughout history. Because of coaching I am more thankful and happy to be alive."
21. Coaching as Life Raft. The attitude of gratitude also came up in our next client interview, with someone who is both a mother and, with her husband, the owner-operator of a small business. Owning your own business and dealing with the buying public are enough to give anyone a bad attitude. Put that together with a lifelong eating disorder and an existentialist philosophy of life and you have a recipe for both despair and cynicism. So why would someone like this come to coaching? "Because I haven't completely given up on doing better," she replied. "Coaching was, for me, a highly personalized, highly individualized, and never "medicalized" learning process. We shared common goals and were figuring things out together. By coaching me through your marathon training and eating programs, you have assisted me to do better in two areas where other programs have failed. I am grateful for that and for life in general. I'm still not a cheery and optimistic person. That's just not in me. But I do enjoy my good days more now than ever before."
22. Coaching as Tiger Team. We interviewed another client who feels a lot of pressure from his work as an engineering project manager in the aerospace industry. The more he accomplishes, the more they give him to do, and the more difficult it becomes to live a balanced and purpose-driven life. "What I needed," he said, "was my own personal Tiger Team. We use that term to refer to a team that analyzes systems in order to identify hidden or heretofore unrecognized problems which might lead to performance declines, boundary violations, workflow interruptions, and decreased earnings. I needed someone to analyze my life that way, before I made too many more compromises. You embraced my Big, Hairy, Audacious Goal -- to reduce the dependence of the United States on fossil fuels -- and you have carefully worked with me to express that goal in my life and work. I am still a long way from where I want to be, but I am much closer than I would have been without coaching."
23. Coaching as Family Affair. Our last client was an extended family who has worked together, as a group, with a coach to lose weight and get in shape over the past 18 months. "Our vision was to transform the fat family into the fit family," reports the inspirational lead sister in the group, "but we ended up with so much more than just fitness. For one thing, since we live in three different states, it was great to start talking with each other again on a weekly basis. The connection was palpable. "And when we met, we didn't just talk about the same old things," continued another sibling, "By joining together as a coaching group, we became focused on health and fitness like never before. So now, when we get together for holidays or special occasions, we eat differently and are more likely to look out for each other." "The whole process has been quite dynamic," noted the brother and only male in the group. "We modified our environment as well as our habits in order to get going with new habits. The weekly coaching call is a powerful accountability forum that assists us to do better all week long."
So what have we learned about the coaching process? Coaching is a relationship, with two or more persons, that assists people to do better in life and work by getting them to:
1. learn new skills
2. take new actions
3. develop new habits
4. design new environments, and
5. find new resolve in the face of difficulty.
Our interviews also gave us great insight into how the coaching relationship gets people to do all that new stuff. Although the needs of each client are unique, over time most coaching relationships include:
1. reflective thinking
2. storytelling
3. appreciative inquiry
4. provocative dialogue
5. role modeling
6. sharing experiences
7. values clarification
8. project collaboration
9. increasing awareness and gaining perspective
10. cultivating creativity
11. transferring knowledge
12. giving permission
13. setting boundaries
14. expressing feelings
15. releasing attachments
16. eliminating tolerations or energy drains
17. testing hypotheses, and
18. genuine caring.
We bring this series to a close with the simple hope that you too will find the resources and the wherewithal to change and grow in the direction of your dreams.
I would love to lend a hand! Give me at call at 216 932 6012 or email me!
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